Virgin Witch (She likes Birds!)

 I hope you like nudity and an absence of plot. When I was getting ready to watch Virgin Witch I had an idea of what I was in store for based solely on the films reputation as a throw away exploitation film.

Released very limitedly in 1971 and then given a wider release in 1972 Virgin Witch was something that was attempting to make a quick buck off of the occult and the figures of their actresses. The actresses primarily being Vicki Michelle and her sister Ann Michelle both of whom amusingly like to deny the films existence. The movie was directed by Ray Austin who was also responsible for House of the Living Dead, that would be the 1973 version mind you, the one that has nothing to do with the living dead and in my opinion is actually worse than this.

Okay so the plot is that two young ladies are looking for work. Of course they are warned beforehand about the evils of getting into modelling and how it’s just a ploy to lure pretty girls into taking off their clothes with promises of fame and fortune.

Initially both girls’ agree that modeling is a bad idea but for some reason Christine (Ann Michelle) is drawn to it after reading a job offer that was seeking out models. I’m not sure if it was supposed to be a magic spell, or Christine has magic, but they do this big close up on her eyes and flash the shot with images of famed modelling agent Sybil Waite (Patricia Haines). They meet and it’s fairly obvious Sybil is a lesbian and very much interested in Christina. Sybil sets up a fake photo shoot and takes her and her sister (for moral support)

This is pretty much where I would assume the horror elements would come in to play. We got naive girls, we got a secluded spot and we got an…apparent plot by a group of witches to initiate virgins into their cult. But no, all this goes on without a single jump, scare or creepy moment. Sure there are a few oddball situations that involve random people coming up the mansion and not speaking. Seriously that’s all they do. They creep on Betty and she runs around lamely until she falls over. I couldn’t help notice that a lot of the guys in this movie didn’t seem to button up their shirts either.

The oddest thing of all is that aside from everyone wanting to have sex with the girls, and the initiation just being about them losing their virginity there is nothing sinister going on. The big twist that I’m going to tell you is that Christine herself is the evil one. She spends the movie just manipulating everyone around her as she tries desperately to learn the dark secrets of witchcraft and eventually try to become high priestess of the cult itself. This really comes out of nowhere and I was scratching my head trying to figure out how it was supposed to make sense.

A positive thing I will say about the film is I actually liked the look of it. Everything just had that classic 70s vibe to it, which isn’t really saying much since it was the decade that the film was made but still I enjoyed that aspect of it. A good scene that does a lot to really set the mood of the era is a small musical number set in a jazzy club where the song “You go your way” is preformed. Of course it has nothing to do with anything but a catchy tune nonetheless.

Like I said before there is a lot of nudity but not really a lot of sex and the sex that does happen is creepy and not “Oh this is a horror movie that’s so creepy” more like “Ew, this is creepy”.  I don’t mind that sort of thing and it’s not really a knock against the movie at all. Actually thinking about it right now I doubt I would be able to pay attention to it for the short 88 minute runtime if not for the fact that I was distracted by boobs.

If you like Exploitation movies from the 70’s and you haven’t yet seen Virgin Witch I would say give it a go but if you’re the type that is looking for something to terrify you or fascinate you with a deep story I say keep moving, nothing to see here.

“That’s right ladies to obtain ultimate enlightenment you need only have sex with me. I’m a doctor.”


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